from ep6/season1 of Silicon Valley on HBO, by Mike Judge.
Here in the Yunderblog I am trying to keep a focus on two worlds: technology and relationships. And since I'm a guy, it will be relationships from the male point of view. I have been groping my way around the world of blogging for a while now, but just know that those two topics are supposed to be the focus here: TECHNOLOGY and RELATIONSHIPS. When the two topics converge, it's my nirvana.
Please excuse the occasional divergence...
Back story for this post -
After the dot com bubble that everyone knows about popped, the telecom bubble also popped. It was almost a trillion dollar debacle by the way Om Malik documented it. And our business probably has the noble distinction of having more CEOs and executives subpoenaed, indicted, convicted, and sent to federal pound you in the ass prison than any other industry. I was one of many who were caught in this disaster. It was around 2003 and I was "between jobs." That description is a nice way of saying I was an unemployed, no-identity, no income loser.
So there I was: jobless. I was single. So what happens to single people? They get introduced to other single people.
I was in California and my aunt in Seoul decided to contact her friend in Southern Cal who has a daughter. I got introduced and got a lunch date. We get to know each other and of course, being a stupid guy, I tell her I am between jobs. After the date the gal tells her mom about me. The mom calls my aunt. My aunt calls me. And it goes something like this: "I just got bitched out by my friend. She couldn't believe that I set up her daughter with an unemployed loser. Why did you tell her you were unemployed?"
I never heard from or made contact with that girl ever again.
This Marketplace story about the modern world, equality and dating is fantastic. In 2min 27sec you get the gist of how complex the modern world has become with the evolution of the idea of equal pay for equal work. Arry and I have talked about this subject a lot.
So to conclude this post using the title of it: the fastest way for a guy to get dumped is to say he lost his job.
If you lose your job and you coincidentally don't want to be with her anymore, then you have the perfect, non-confrontational way to end the relationship. She will feel sorry for you as she dumps you and you'll be free at last, free at last, thank God almighty, free at last.
If your girlfriend says she loves you no matter what and proclaims her undying love for you, then ask to move in with her. See how long that lasts. If she continues to have undying love for you, then start borrowing money from her. Never pay it back. If you get this far and the love still springs eternal, then you probably need to marry her because no one else in the world will want the deadbeat who is you.
My name is Dae Yu.